Showing posts with label Things I think About When I Obviously Need to Be Sleeping. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Things I think About When I Obviously Need to Be Sleeping. Show all posts

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Contested!

Here's something I just don't get: RWA Contests. I've heard they're a good way to get your novel noticed--especially when the prize is prime placement on an editor's reading list. But, specifically, the judging seems counterintuitive.

I've heard several stories of writers who entered contests--agented writers, writers who have been published, and writers who IMHO turn out high-quality writing no matter what--and were given good marks overall, but received exceptionally low marks and persnickety, nitpicky comments from one or two judges. And, usually, the judges getting their hate on are unpublished, or have only a couple of publishing credits to their name.

Maybe it's because I'm new to all this organized writing business, but right here is where I start not getting it. The judges mark all these categories and are supposed to judge the readability and saleability of the submission--but how can they do that if they haven't sold much, themselves?

And if the writers doing the critiquing don't have a solid string of sales under their belt, what is their opinion but the opinion of a reader who may or may not like the type or style of story the contest entrant writes? What special insight do they have into the industry that can benefit the contest entrant? Now, if Nora Roberts or some other luminary of the genre were judging the contest, the whole setup would make sense: Experienced, successful expert offers learned opinion and judgment. But otherwise?

If I were judging a contest, my opinion would and should be worth exactly as much as the average reader's. Sure, I'm a writer, but I don't have any great string of credits under my belt. I don't have any experience, except my love of the genre as a reader, that makes me qualified to judge the saleability of a story. And as a reader, I've never quit reading a book over minor details, plot points I think should have been included, or the occasional punctuation error.

If anyone reading this has entered a contest, I ask, honestly, earnestly, humbly, "Why?"

  1. Are contests helpful?
  2. Do you feel like the critiques of the judges are useful?
  3. What usually prompts you to enter a contest?

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Saturday, January 19, 2008

Seven Random Facts About Me

Ann Aguirre tagged me to blog 7 random facts about myself on Thursday. I'm just getting around to it now. Better late than never, right?

  1. I know the place of purchase and price of every article of clothing I own, no matter how long ago I got it. If I bought it on sale, I can also tell you the original price and how much I saved.

  2. I love fabric. I am, in fact, a fabric whore, known to wander the aisles of fabric stores across Los Angeles admiring the color and weave of wares I rarely purchase. Bonus: every story I've ever written contains at least one fairly detailed description of fabric--the material, the color, the weave, the pattern or the dye-process.

  3. I am just under six feet tall.

  4. The reason I use a lot of exclamation points in my blog posts and comments? I really talk that way. Really!

  5. I love false/created spaces. Las Vegas, Disneyland, miniature golf courses, malls built to look like 19th century European or American towns, odd little houses around LA that look like hobbit houses or castles or pagodas.

  6. I'm fascinated with trains. From 19th Century steam engines, to 20th century trollies, to Angel's Flight (Los Angeles's late, and much missed funicular rail line) to subways to light rail. Trains are cool.

  7. I am almost unbeatable at "Connect 4"
Okay, now I have to tag 7 people. I tag Sarai, Isabelle Santiago, Carolyn Jean, Grammar Geek Laurie, Kate Rothwell, Sherry Thomas and December Quinn

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Thursday, January 17, 2008

Reviews!

Heather of Errant Dreams Reviews posted reviews of Ember and Like a Thief in the Night. I think I will take up embroidery so I can stitch quotes* from those reviews onto a warm, fuzzy quilt. When the weather turns cold, I can curl up on the couch with the quilt around my shoulders and a hot cup of tea in my hands, and I'll feel just the way I did when I read the reviews. ::sigh::

Ann Aguirre--talented author; email correspondent of La Nora; and recipient of a kickass cool cover blurb for her forthcoming novel, Grimspace, from none other than the awesome Sharon Shinn--also wrote a review of Like a Thief in the Night. Which I also love. That one, I think I will stitch into a warm scarf to wear outside when it's cold like it is tonight--terribly windy and barely 40 degrees. Brrrr!

I will keep those reviews close when someone inevitably finds my characters too unlikable to bear, or gets annoyed by my "everything and the kitchen sink" approach to genre, or notices that place on page 73 where I used the same adjective twice in two paragraphs.

Now, I'll go to sleep. It's a quarter to two, and the work-week from hell hasn't yet let go of me. Good night.


* All quotes will be properly noted and attributed--perhaps on a matching pair of socks. As footnotes. Foot notes. Ugh! I think I really need sleep. I always get punny when I'm tired.

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Saturday, January 12, 2008

The "Create a Contest" Contest

A little bird reminded me I should be promoting Like a Thief in the Night and letting people know that this red hot futuristic tale of sex, murder, magic and mayhem will be available for sale at Samhain Publishing on January 15, 2008 for the low, low price of $3.50.

But how should I promote the novella? Maybe a contest? I wracked my brain, which took all of 2 seconds, and came up with these ideas:

  • The "Guess Bettie's Favorite Color Contest"
  • The "Tell Bettie Why You Deserve a Free Book" Contest
  • The "Guess How Many Fingers Bettie is Holding Up Behind her Back" Contest.
Maybe I'm not so good at this contest thing. Maybe I used up my one good idea on the Hard Boiled contest. No, wait, I have one more idea: I'll let potential contest entrants make up their own contest.

So, here's the deal. Post your single best idea for a contest in the comments of this post. If I pick that idea, you'll win a free copy of Like a Thief in the Night and I'll hold the contest in February, with a second copy of Like a Thief... as the prize. Entries must be submitted by 6 P.M. Pacific on Monday, January 14, 2008.

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Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Fiddler and Her Proofs

I should be all aglow with happiness--the final version of Like a Thief in the Night is turned in, and the excerpt is up on the Samhain site. Instead, all I see are things I want to change.

I can't help it, I'm a fiddler. I nitpick. I tweak.

Editor Laurie and the ever-patient Bam can attest, every time I send in a draft, something is different. I just can't help it. Just yesterday, I noticed in Ember chapter 8 that I described fabric as jacquard when I really meant brocade. O, the horror! I can't believe I did that! (Sorry, Anonymous Auction Winner!). It will be fixed in the full PDF.

I can't leave well enough alone. I change a word here, a sentence there. When a question about my main character that wakes me in the middle of the night like, "What does she do when she's not killing people?" I have to answer it.

It's like some kind of curse: Lo, and she shall edit nigh until the very end.

One of these days, I'm going to have to learn to let go. Maybe I can do that by obsessing on my next WIP?

WIP Title: Rohais
Word Count: 7,000/95,000
Current Favorite Words:
Alone of all my sisters, I was not named to honor queens or saints. Instead, my stepmother named me for the climbing rose on the south wall of her garden, with its sweet scent and wicked thorns.

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Sunday, December 16, 2007

Forget Santa Clause, I Want the Green Fairy

Editor Paula Guran on the Juno Books blog did a post about absinthe. It is quite fashionable right now. Damn, but I hate to be a trend hopper. My husband collects interesting liquors the way some men collect baseball cards, and he's been wanting a bottle of the EU-legal stuff for a couple of years. As the exchange rate has only gotten worse over time, I decided it was now or never and ordered him up a bottle for Christmas.

I've been curious about absinthe for a while. How could anyone who loves art nouveau not be? Add that to my general impressionability (I am the girl who started smoking in college because of all those classic Hollywood movies--don't worry, I quit.), and it's a wonder I didn't belly up to the absinthe website and order a bottle sooner.

Then there's the allure of the ritual. I must admit, I am a sucker or food and beverage rituals. Currently, I have tea service in both the English and Japanese styles, Turkish coffee (I start by roasting the beans), South American coco, and, of course, more bar paraphernalia than you can shake a swizel stick at (oh, I just love those itty umbrellas). And I'm really wanting a samovar so I can make myself a good cup of Persian tea (I blame the local Persian eatery, and Marjane Satrapi's Embroideries for that one.) Also, I'd really like some of those little things to make Vietnamese coffee.

I have a feeling I probably won't like the absinthe. I've never been a big fan of anise, and that's a major flavor in la fee verte. But I'll probably like the ritual of it. In the case of my tea/coffee/coco habits, the ritual is as soothing as the resulting beverage. Our society does everything so quickly--fast food, fast coffee, and lots of both as we travel so we can keep going, going, going--it's nice to slow down and take the time to go through a series of steps before savoring the fruits of your patience (this is especially true with the drip, drip, drip of Vietnamese coffee--you have to be patient, or you'll go crazy). And when you have guests, the ritual gives you time to talk while you're preparing, and a good excuse to linger over your coffee, tea or cocktail once it's finished. When you have to wait for something, you generally don't want to just gulp it down.

Anyway, point is...what was the point? Oh, yeah, slow ritual = good. I'll let you know what I think of the absinthe after we open the bottles at Christmas. :o)

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Tuesday, December 11, 2007

In Praise of Genre Fiction

If you read genre fiction, you've probably heard the laundry-list of complaints about it from readers of "serious" literature: formulaic, cliche, tawdry, unoriginal, and--worst of all--popular. Genre Haters seem to think any novel shelved by plot or content is, by definition, a lesser species of fiction.

But that's a load of bullshit. If bookstores started shelving "Sprawling, multi-generational family dramas" together, you'd find The Godfather, The Corrections and Love in the Time of Cholera in the same section as the oeuvre of the late-yet-still-writing VC Andrews. Would proximity to the late Ms. Andrews make the first three books any less worthy? Would it make Flowers in the Attic any less addictively terrible?

Genre haters have a tendency to compare the worst of genre fiction with the best of literary fiction, and then acting like it's a foregone conclusion that "literature" would come out on top. And, worse yet, if a bit of genre or popular fiction is particularly good, they start calling it literature. By subject matter and structure, Jane Austen's stories are romances, but, somehow, because they're so very good, they're literature. Likewise, the insanely popular, often maudlin and always melodramatic works of Charles Dickens transcend the author's immense popularity and often trite subject matter (Oliver Twist, anyone?) and wildly popular roots to become "literature".

The way I see it, there are only so many plots and themes out there, and, depending on historical era and geographical location, some of those plots and themes are more popular than others. So what if genre fiction works with a predetermined set of known elements--so does opera. Does musicians and music-lovers hate on opera for all those tales of doomed, stupid lovers? Nope. Opera lovers love the music. The subject matter is just a framework.

That's kind of how I feel about genre fiction. Genre is a framework around which I can let my imagination run wild. If you pick up a murder mystery, you know somebody gonna get killed, and the crime is gonna get solved. But the how, where, when, and why of it--oh, those are some fabulous details. If you pick up a romance, you know folks are going to fall in love, and no matter what kind of crazy shit happens between the words "Chapter One" and "The End" those folks are gonna have some kind of a happy ending.

One reason I like writing romance is that it incorporates elements from every other genre. Absolutely anything can happen between Chapter One and the End--mystery, adventure, intrigue, emotional drama. Romance novels can be contemporary, historical, futuristic, speculative, magical. Romance offers an incredible latitude of possibilities built around the simple, easily accessible framework of a romantic relationship.

The other reason I like writing romance? The happy ending.


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Saturday, November 24, 2007

CONTROL!

Talking with my mother on the issue of coming out of the writing closet/letting people read my stuff, I realized that my whole conflict/shyness thing is totally a control issue. (Sorry to go all therapy-talk on you)

But here's the thing: Writing is the Ultimate Control Trip. I can create a world, and have it be just the way I want. I control every aspect of what I write...right up until the point that someone reads it. Then it becomes theirs.

Unlike my characters, readers can think anything they want. They can love or hate my writing, my story, my characters. They can use my writing as a reason to love or hate me. And I can't control any of it.

How awful is it to go from complete control to no control at all? This must be why some writers hate reviews. Not only does the reviewer take over your work, they then proceed to write about it, and thereby present your writing in a way you might not want it presented.

I never understood why authors behave like fucktards ((c) 2007, Karen Scott), lambasting people who don't like their work and trying to shout down critics, bloggers and/or commenters, but surely, this must be the reason.

Control.

It's so hard to give it up. It's hard to know that your work, and you will be judged. And that you have no control over it. I guess I always expected judgment from some nameless, faceless "readership". That I could deal with--that is something I know I can't control. But what about my near and dear? People who know me, people whose opinions I value in my everyday life?

What if they read my stuff and don't like it? Or, what if they read my stuff and decide I am some crazy perv because my stories contain teh sexin'? Or that I'm secretly psycho because my stories are usually kinda violent? What if? What if? What if?

Screw it. I love to write. I'm not going to stop writing because of "What if?" And I certainly don't want to run around shouting at people who form opinions of my work that I don't like. I'll just have to learn to let go.

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Sunday, October 28, 2007

Bettie, the Duchess

Dear Reader(s),

Good news, y'all. The fires are out, the relatives are safely back at home (with some water issues, but, still, doable), and Yours Truly is a Duchess.

I won the title in the Smart Bitches "Guess That Lonely Heart" contest, but I feel like a bit of a scheming hussy, because I was actually the second person with the right answer--the first poster simply neglected to include the name of the book's heroine in her response.

Perhaps this makes me an evil Duchess? Woo hoo! But don't worry. I won't let it go to my head.

Anyway, where was I? Ah yes, you may kiss my ring. Oh, wait, that's the Pope, isn't it? (Wouldn't it be cool if the Smart Bitches bestowed ecclesiastical titles? Cause I totally want a mitre.) I suppose a simple curtsy will have to do. (See how gracious I am?)

Hugs and kisses,

Her Grace, Bettie Sharpe...

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Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Tall Order

When I try to recall the Romance novels I've read from the eighties they blur into this weird image of a hydra-headed chimera of asshole billionaires, white savages and pirates--all somehow depicted by Fabio--forcibly seducing a veritable secretarial pool full of foot-stamping, head-tossing, chin-lifting virginal heroines. And, I seem to recall, that for most of those asshole billionaires/white savages/pirate princes, "tall" was 6' or maybe 6'2".

Lately, though, I can't seem to find a Romance hero under 6'4". And don't even get me started on paranormal romances, where the heroes remind me of that episode of Gilligan's Island where the castaways found a box of radio-active seeds and inadvertently grew giant versions of garden variety vegetables. In paranormal, it seems, there isn't a hero under 6'6".

To which I say WTF?! Heroes have gotten super-tall, but heroines have remained small and feisty. Whenever I see such a pairing in print, I imagine the heroine as a fluffy Pomeranian (not unlike my current favorite TV dog, Mr. Muggles) yapping around the hero's feet. If authors are going to keep writing giant-sized heroes, they could, at the very least, make their heroines a few inches taller, too?

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Thursday, September 13, 2007

Go to Your Happy Place

I love being a California kid. Granted, the waters pictured are the pristine currents of Malibu, and not the seedy shores of Venice where, as a child, I whiled away many an afternoon, sun-browned and bored off my gourd asking "Please can we go home now?"

In the summer, when Venice and the former People's Republic of Santa Monica were overrun with tourists, I would stare at those plump, ruddy Midwesterners, and sun-shaded, be-visored Japanese tour groups and wonder why in the world people would want to spend their summer vacations here.

People from other places think that summer is the best time to go to the beach. And, sure, it ain't bad. But every California kid knows that the best, Best, BEST time to go to the beach is a hot day in September. The tourists have all gone home, the sun is hot, the breeze is cool, and the water is ice cold.

On a hot day in September, you can have the beach all to yourself. The view for which rich folks pay millions (over and over again--those houses tend to wash away) can be yours for the price of the gas it takes to get there.

Those ugly toes in the picture are mine. And so, for a few hours, was that lovely stretch of beach.

I wonder what the weather will be like this weekend?

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Friday, September 7, 2007

I DO Has Internets!

Whew! My new and improved web page has arrived. I spent my free time today making graphics and slapping together pages. All in all, I think it ain't bad for a day's work.

I went with a film noir / pulp novel theme, because that's what I'm interested in, lately. I reserve the right to change my mind.

Go check it out!
www.bettiesharpe.com

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Thursday, September 6, 2007

I Can Has Internets?

My editor (God, that's so fun to write!) wrote today with a bazillion attachments and groups and such, including instructions on how to write my Samhain Publishing author bio (squee!). No surprises there, but I listed my website, which, currently, is, well, just an address with this picture.

Like it? I drew it myself to commemorate The Cutest Haircut Ever. When my husband saw the cut, he said, "You look like an anime character." Which I, loving anime the way I do, took as a compliment. And inspiration.

Only problem is, the Cutest Haircut Ever was hell to maintain. As much as I like to picture myself as the sort of woman who will straighten/style her hair and apply makeup every day, I just ain't her. So I'm curly again. I ran to the hairdresser waving the goth-flapper spread from American Vogue's 8 lb. September's issue over my head like a battle flag and Oswaldo turned me into a less frizzy, biracial, supertall Clara Bow. My neck looks twelve miles long. I should draw a new picture.

But all that's beside the point. The point is...What was the point? Oh, yeah: I Have To Get My Web Page in Shape!!! Don't know why I haven't already, except, you know, a glaring lack of content. But I has web chops (used to do the design thing during college, back in the dot.com era. But didn't everyone?) and a copy of PhotoShop, and I knows how to use 'em.

The only thing standing between me and a semi-decent web home is...my complete and utter lack of inspiration. I'm still super-keen on my girly-girl blog graphic (the flower, BTW, is Foxglove, so it's not too saccharine) but I feel like my web presence needs to be about something.

So I started asking myself:

  1. What's your style as a Romance writer? Um. Villains are people, too?
  2. What themes do your current stories and WIPs have in common?
    Sex! Violence! Explosions! Sly references to classic Hollywood films. Everything and the kitchen sink!
It wasn't until much later, when I was extolling the virtues of John Woo's Hard Boiled to my HK Cinema-deprived little sis ("...and then, after the villain sets the hospital on fire and his henchmen shoot people in wheelchairs, Hot-Young-Chow-Yun-Fat has to save the babies. And then the baby pees on him!") that I realized where I'd snatched my winking "everything and the kitchen sink" aesthetic from.

Cue the angels singing...Ahhh-ahhh-AHHHH
I want to be the John Woo of Romance Novels!
What the fuck-all this has to do with a web page, I don't know. But I'll figure something out.


Also, have I mentioned? I'm drunk. Tipsy. Glass and a half of white wine with dinner. I'm a cheap date, not an alkie. Really.

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Thursday, August 16, 2007

Falling Between the Crack

"Mommy, mommy, why are those two circles kissing?"

"Well, honey, when two or more circles love each other very much, they get married and form a Venn Diagram."

Am I the only romance reader who plays video games? Or maybe I'm the only romance reader who plays the sort of cheesy, button-mashing action games that read like they were thought up by a focus group of stoned 14 year old boys.

Or maybe I'm just the only one geeky enough to make a diagram about it.

Point is, I saw this:


And immediately thought of this:


If you don't play video games, please trust me when I say that this game is not exactly the highpoint of the modern video game experience. The plot reads like fan fiction based on a corporate-sponsored Saturday morning cartoon; the hero levels up with strange new powers toward the end; it features both a tormented, brooding quasi-demonic hero with major mother issues and a scantily clad vixen with mysterious intentions who somehow reminds the hero of his mother.

Actually, I guess the two entertainment products aren't so dissimilar, after all.

Aww. Don't be hatin', cause I'm not. You know I love the cheesy goodness. I kid, because I love.

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Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Rock Star

Now, I'm not one of those people who will forgive R. Kelly every pervy thing just cause the man can write a good song. Nope. "R" isn't getting another cent of my money. Damn, but the man does turn out some good songs. If you ever see R.Kelly songs on my hard drive, you can report me to the FBI because I will have pirated those tracks.

So anyway, I was listening to "Rockstar" and I caught this line: "The way we f*ck gonna lead to child birthin'." Now, R always veers into TMI when he's trying to be sexy, and I've always found that amusing. But there isn't a damn thing sexy or amusing about that line. If a guy said that to me in the bedroom, I would pull up my pants and run away. Fast.

Is it a symptom of these modern times we live in that the thought of sex for procreative purposes totally turns me off? I guess I see how other people might think it's romantic. The miracle of birth and all that shit. But not me. Maybe it's just the stage of my life I'm in right now? The stage where I like having disposable income and sleeping in on Saturdays?

I have jumped off buildings and cliffs, hurled myself down the side of snowy mountains, rafted rivers, raced on galloping stallions without the proper headgear, and engaged in all sorts of risky behavior for the thrill of it, but sex without birth control? Nah-uh.

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Saturday, August 11, 2007

A Thousand Words to Tell the Tale

The pawnbroker used a short stepladder to reach the silver-framed photograph I'd asked for. He held it two-handed as he stood atop the ladder and didn't let go, even when the ladder wobbled as he descended to the floor.

He let loose a shaky rattle of a breath when the slick soles of his scuffed loafers settled on the beige-flecked tile of terra firma, but he kept the frame clasped to his chest. Like it was worth something. Like it wasn't just some cheap family tchochke great aunt Amity's junkie nephew had stolen and pawned to get a fix.

In this neighborhood, the drugs changed, but the story never did.

"How much?"

"It's hard to say." The pawnbroker scratched his liver-spotted scalp with one careful finger, as if he still had hair and was afraid of messing it up.

"There's a tag on it, ain't there?"

He flipped the frame over and squinted at the yellowed bit of paper pasted on the black cardboard flap stand. The old man squinted at the hand-written price, but I could read it just fine.

"Fifty cents. I'll take it."

"Not so fast." He held out a hand, like the Supremes telling me to Stop! In the Name of Love, but he couldn't get his knobby elbow straight. The palm of his big-knuckled hand was crisscrossed with more lines than a Los Angeles freeway map.

I wondered if he’d ever had his palm read. I imagined the fortune-teller—some turban-topped charlatan with kohl gumming up the wrinkles round her rheumy eyes, and a sham accent that sounded like a cross between Bela Lugosi and Pepe LePew.

“You vill die young,” she would have said, her smoker’s wheeze adding a shadow of death to an otherwise rote recitation of impending doom. “I see it in your lifeline, yes?” She stabs her stubby finger into the center of his hand like she means to pound it through to the table beneath. “Very short.”


He would have laughed it off. I could see him as a young man, thick hair slicked back, blue eyes bright with confidence—no, arrogance. He would have been a looker. Before his wrinkled lids started to sag like curtains falling on an empty stage, he would have had bedroom eyes.

He would have been the kind of man who made you think he could see through your clothes when he looked at you across the room. And then the flash of smile, the slow wink when he caught your glare that made you think he was mischievous instead of perverted. That made you think it might not be so bad if he did see you naked.

He still used that look now, only it didn’t work with wrinkles and false teeth. He’d given me that look when I walked into the store, and I’d curved my hand into a fist at my side because I’d wanted to slap the smile off his face. Stupid old perv.

But then I’d seen the photograph, faded gray in a tarnished silver frame. It was sitting in a decade of dust on the shelf above the brass-backed cash register. I’d asked for it, and held my breath as he’d hobbled up the old stepladder to retrieve it.

Which brings me back to now. And the old perv telling my tits—and, by association, me—that the price was higher than what the tag said.

“Five dollars.” His hand still wavered in the air above the counter, like he’d forgotten it was there.

“Nah-uh.” I shook my head. “State law says you got to charge the prices as marked.”

“I haven’t hand-priced a damned thing in this store for twenty years. The price on the tag’s just out of date.”

“That’s your problem. I’ll give you fifty cents.”

He raised his chin so he could look up at my face from beneath those hound-dog wrinkles. “What do you want it for, anyway? The frame’s silver-plate, and the people in the photo are ugly.”

“Some salesman you are.”

“Just curious.”

I shrugged. “I’m a writer. I collect things—pieces of other people’s lives. It helps me imagine stories.”

“And this picture?”

Too late, I saw where he was going. “It’s interesting.”

“Is it worth a thousand words?”

“I try to stay away from clichés. Bad for business, you know?”

“Like writer’s block is bad for business?” His cloudy eyes narrowed. “You’re out walking after dark in this neighborhood. It snowed last night, and the wind is cold enough to freeze the slush to solid ice right now. It’s a good night to be inside, writing.”

“It’s invigorating. I like the cold air.”

“And the crime.”

“That, too.”

“Come off it. You want the picture or not?”

“Sure.” I reached into my pocket. “Here’s fifty cents.”

“Nah-uh.” The non-word negative sounded strange coming out of his mouth. Childish, and just a little mean. “Words are tough to come by right now. How much would you pay for a thousand ‘em?”

I pulled out my wallet and slapped down a five. “All right. Five dollars.”

He just let the bill lay there like the half-dead rat a cat brings in when it’s feeling generous and wants to share. The cat thinks it’s impressive, but all you can think about is the best way to get the rat into the trash without touching it.

“Ten dollars.”

I glanced over at the photo. A stern-faced mother with a fresh permanent in her graying hair and a too-tight rayon dress stared out of the frame like a Vaudevillian staring down a heckler. A little girl with a square jaw sat in a wicker chair beside her. The girl was an unwilling, unlikely Shirley Temple; sturdy and solemn, smothered in bows and ruffles, her thin hair tortured into limp curls.

There was a story here.

I slapped down another five and snatched the frame.

“A thousand words,” he yelled as I rushed out through the grubby glass door and into the cold, dark night.


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Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Bettie's EXCELlent Adventure

Or, how I went totally OCD on my 70 Days of Sweat Word Count Tracking Sheet. Observe:

My OCD 70 Days of Sweat Tracking Sheet has the following features:

  • Allows tracking of multiple Works in Progress
  • Provides word count totals for each WIP by 70 Days of Sweat check-in date.
  • Provides Total Word Count as a sum of all WIP word counts for each 70 Days of Sweat check-in date
  • Provides total word count for each WIP (see below)
  • Provides total word count for 70 Days of Sweat (see below)


  • Contains snazzy If/Then statements to ensure it only displays totals when new words have been added.
  • Color-coded by week in soothing pastel shades.
Concerned coworkers, friends and family have suggested that I might be a little too "into" spreadsheets. Perhaps they're right. But just wait until you see the PowerPoint show I'm working on... ;oP

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Saturday, August 4, 2007

A Man, A Plan, A Canal -- Panama!

This has nothing to do with Panama. I just like palindromes.
________________________

About 11 months ago, I wrote a post about a story that was almost finished. It was the Original "The Bitter End". That story, the "Untitled Sci-fi" is very close to finished. But I still haven't finished it. It's one of the stories that I mapped out and outlined before I got in touch with my inner seat-of-the-panster. Maybe that's why I'm having no luck finishing it--there's no suspense left in the writing.

In the time since I wrote that post, I've written two short stories, and started on a full-length novel about which I am very excited. But my "Untitled Sci-fi" nags at me. So here's my goal: I will finish that story by August 28, 2007 -- a year to the day that I first complained about it.

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Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Bad Versus Worse

Completely random and apropos of nothing except the use of the abbreviation for the word "versus" in the post above, here are three movies I'd like to see packaged as a box set:

  1. Freddie vs. Jason
  2. Alien vs. Predator
  3. Santa Claus vs. The Martians

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